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Billy Ray

Billy Ray

Billy Ray came to school today
It's been so long, but he came anyway
Just this once, he's gonna learn a thing or two

Saw a girl down the hall
He was kinda short; she was kinda tall
But it didn't matter, he did what he had to do

Hands all red while he gave his heart
to a girl who tore it all apart
What he learned that day, our boy would never tell

He got much more than he bargained for
His heart beside him on the floor
It was figurative, but it hurt like hell

She hands our boy a crown of thorns
she made from roses that were worn
She's been handed her share of flowers long before

Hands still red but in his heart,
the color's faded in the dark
He tried to paint it red, but couldn't anymore

The morning rise awoke his eyes
It smelled like roses that had died
Awoken long before he realized what was done

He said come to mind, but let me be
None so blind as who refuse to see,
but that doesn't apply when someone's looking at the sun

Awoken long 'fore he saw his heart
was broken, wronged, and torn apart
He looked again, for he felt so insecure

Skipping school once again,
the spear on his side has gone within
His best excuse, but the worst thing he's endured

They say in love, we all must learn
They say that fire's gotta burn
But what would happen if they never said those things?

Would the whip still lash upon a back?
Would closed eyelashes bring a black
that only closed eyes could ever truly bring?

The girl's bore pains that were her cross
She's found herself within a loss
But that doesn't mean she's gotta nail his skin

Lying there in the dark,
her pain's so far in his heart
He feels the pain that had always been

Footprints dressed all in red
They thought our boy was all but dead
But so much wont happen if you learn to just refuse

Billy Ray came to school today
Broken heart, but anyway
He says love's a game that somebody's gotta lose

teardrops

teardrops

I'm hearin' teardrops out my window
I'm hearin' cries that ain't the wind
I'm lookin' in the mirror
'cause this feels like it's the end


Love's like dancin' in the rain
to a song you'll never learn
in waters that would drown you
if they ever failed to burn


Lookin' out my window -
out my window once again,
I see someone sadly knows
but doesn't understand
He failed to hear the thunder
loudly say to him
"We've seen our share of broken hearts"
He had a dream he held within

but sometimes you've gotta wake
There are times that never mend
Lightning struck what it would break -
Love's murdered once again

But the rain just falls
and through it all,
the sky can't keep from crying
I saw the man just fall and fall
This guy can't keep from trying
Demented rain to kill again,
relented now in sighing
In the rain, I think again -
what's the use in trying?


I heard a phone that had to ring
but only in a mind
did he ever call her back
In reality she cried


Cold's the same as loneliness
She's frozen to the bone
So lost she is from happiness,
she's found herself alone

The wind blew through her opened door
Her head - it never turned
For why shy away from loneliness
to only end up burned

She woke today and didn't pray
All the rain had dried away
The morning sun made her think
What's the use in crying?

She had her tears, but never here
He died trying to find her
But all that life has made her think
is what's the use in dying?

Writer's Block

Writer's Block

Through writer's block, I knock
on those stone-cold doors again
They answer through their silence
but never let me in

Time and time again,
I'm lost and somewhat found
So with empty pad and pen,
I find it hard to now sit down

on these hallway floors again -
I've fallen to the ground
Never do I write
but still I'm writing now

And I write far on top -
on top my writer's block
Till it goes away again,
I write my every thought

As the ink is wearing thin,
till all my ink is gone;
the day is wearing thin
although the day is long

Through all that I have been,
I've not kept from being strong
I write another line
although the ink is gone

And as the paper's staying white
on which I try to write,
it's blown away by breeze -
the breeze of all my plight

I'm writing in my mind -
my words are just a dream
I'm writing all the time,
as time is everything

The block on which I write
has grown and touched the sky
but I'll climb my every mountain
as long as I survive

The block on which I write
weighs heavy on my mind,
but I will overcome
like I have my every time

So I'm writing on the ground
outside the coldest doors
It doesn't matter if they open -
it doesn't matter anymore

I'm writing now somehow
till my writing has to end
And after all that I have written,
I'm writing still within

Remembering a time

Remembering a time

A cold man
playing with some matches
ignores all those who say
fire burns

A sweet girl
messin' with the sour
doesn't realize she'll be bitter
in the bitter cold

A soft hand
the softest of an answer
can't turn away the harshness of his scorn

His hard hand
burned by all the matches
Maybe she was better off in the cold

A long day
really isn't over
until you forget it never really was

A sweet girl
with a morsel of the sour
remembers a time that made her strong

The Spotlight

The Spotlight

The spotlight blinds
and burns me
but my wounds will never kill.
So would I rather
see my pain
or would I rather feel?

My only thought
upon this stage
is the only thing that's real
is whatever
makes you feel alive
is all that you should feel.

In a room of darkness shrouded,
she put her wounds away.
Pouring from her eyelids,
her wounds would never stay.

Her sleeves were never long enough,
so she would never leave.
Can't you shine the spotlight in there?
She needs it more than me.

Still I sing a song - a daydream -
is all it ever was
No spotlight here to burn me,
though that's all it ever does.

But the girl is in
no daydream.
Her dreams are only done.
I wish that I could help her,
but all I have's the sun.

All I have's
a voice that's
rasping from my lungs.
The only person clapping
has never truly come.

There's thousands that surround me,
but I'm the only one.
I'd sing another song,
but the concert's come undone.

So as the spotlight's dimming,
I fall onto the floor.
The darkness is beginning
to be what I adore.

All the crowd has left me;
all that I had owned.
Through blinded eyes I see her
sitting all alone.

Shine the spotlight on her,
so this little girl can see.
Shine the spotlight on her.
She needs it more than me.

The Morning Dew (An Insomniac's Epiphany)

The Morning Dew (An Insomniac's Epiphany)

Midnight's come and gone
I lie upon my bed again

My eyes are drawn
to the dawn
rising everywhere
but within

My heart is set
at dawn as yet
my soul's at dusk as I begin
my day
without a wink
of sleep the hours fly I think

why I'm here
in living drear
A life to somehow be away
from or so I hear
I'm never near
For it's easier to sleep at day

While at night,
escape a dream -
unconsciously is what I do
Escape a life
I realize
awakened by the morning dew

The City of Angels

The City of Angels

Angelically blessed, I lay to rest
four million tormented souls
So sweetly to die
in the city that I
vowed I'd never go

An angel mistaken -
Never a halo -
Just an aura from a Hollywood scene

An angel forsaken-
Never unwaken-
Dejected just to dream

We should've known it
by the heat of the winter,
the misnomer's only a name

Never to leave,
only to enter
We'll never leave again

Nothing

Nothing

Decrepit vagrant at your feet
Nickel begged from your hand
Living life is never sweet
Living sweet - you'd never stand

And still the world's a spinning top
The slow unraveled bits of string
From the bottom to the top,
we live to question everything

Until our spin is nevermore,
we're all like vagrants on the floor
If life is what we implore
Life is this and nothing more

The Valiant Must Perish

The Valiant Must Perish

I feel as though I've fallen
I've felt as though I fell
I've walked as though my crawlin'
would lead me to my hell

I've looked upon a pile
of burning ensign rags
Reflected for a while
upon the burning flags

White to choose surrender
Colored be my death
to have forever rendered
the dying of my breath

I reached in pyred ardent
I chose my own demise
I waved the white disheartened
just to stay alive

I wish I waved the colored
even if it meant my death
I lived for coming years
but I wish I lived the rest

The Calm of the Dark

The Calm of the Dark

Now I don't know if it's the calm of the storm
or the dark of the dawn,
but something's about to happen

I sit in the dark of the calm
right before dawn
with a storm right on the horizon

With you in a frame,
I picture again
as I wait for Fate to try to destroy me

You lighted the sky,
so I'd fight till I died
if death wasn't such a part of me

I'm gonna say what I say
and die as I may
whether you ever love me or not

I'm gonna say what I say so I can live in a way
that you're in every memory I've got